The Sensibly Selfish Manifesto

Barbara Hannah Grufferman always has something great to say about midlife. This weeks article in the Huffington post  is no exception, based on her own past experiences and regrets she has created a manifesto for others to learn from.

The Sensibly Selfish Manifesto 
What would I add to the list? For me my experiences are in many ways only relevant to myself. I have created my life exactly the way I want it to be. My hurdles and challenges have made me into the person I am today. The past is gone, the future in the distance, only today matters.
I can also look at the experiences of my midlife coaching clients and see themes, yet will these be relevant for the next generation? Will they listen even if we give them advice. We baby boomers certainly didn’t listen to our parents and at the same time if we had their experience were not necessarily relevant for todays world.
What would I tell a younger woman today to think about. These would be my main soap box issues:
1. Be Sensibly Selfish.
Always put on the oxygen mask first, learn to come from your true self. Say ‘no’ when you mean it, say ‘yes’ when you mean it. Do everything thing with love and passion. When you come from a place of Sensibly Selfish you actually give the world around you inspiration and passion. Always, always breath and listen to your heart before doing anything.
2. Love
First and foremost love thyself, when you are happy giving love to you, you can then enter into relationships with others, with confidence without loosing your self esteem. Be true to yourself, never loose your ‘joie de vivre’ for the sake on anyone else. Learn how to love and be loved in return. Remember that within a relationship you must have space to grow, do things independent of one another in order to remain close. Also remember that you are the only person you will spend your whole life with no matter what, be kind to yourself.
3. Nourish your temple
Your body is your temple here on earth. Despite what everyone else tells you, you are the only person who can decide the way you will nourish it. For Amy Winehouse who died yesterday nourishment meant substance abuse, without it perhaps she would not have created the beautiful music that she will be eternally remembered for. Listen to what your body is telling you, seek expert advice, do your own due diligence and think of the consequences.
4. Laugh
Laugh often. Something as adults we forget to do yet laughter is the fountain of youth and salvation of the planet. When you laugh you cannot be angry. When you laugh others laugh with you. Laughter is an energy just as electricity is. You cannot see it yet it transforms lives. This is a powerful tool at everyones fingertips and needs to be used constantly.
5. Be your own boss
Think seriously about having your own business. With the constant internet innovation there is nothing stopping you from working at home and building a business as well as bringing up a family. The world is flat and it is yours to conquer. If you are looking for financial freedom being your own boss is the place you are most likely to find it.
6. Create a personal nest egg
In the future, state pensions may not be worth anything, government health services may not exist, you will need to rely on your own investments to provide for your future. Invest wisely, seek the knowledge you need to create a nest egg. Seek this knowledge from those who have already ‘got the t-shirt’. Look at all alternatives and invest wisely. Property, stocks and shares, compound interest, skills and qualifications. Make sure you have your own bank account with six month emergency fund even if you are happily married!
7. Never Stop Learning
The day you stop learning needs to be the day you die. Make sure every day you learn something new. Then make a decision whether that new found knowledge is relevant to your life and if it is most importantly you need to apply it to your life immediately. There is a great deal of difference between knowing something and doing something.
If you want to know more about being Sensibly Selfish then sign up now!


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